Is it June yet?

Seriously...I have SO far to go. SO many more bad days ahead of me. I know that doesn't sound positive...but it's hard to be positive when I know the road that lies ahead of me. Yesterday I felt pretty nausaus all day. Then at about 9pm...I threw up (sorry for graphic details...). Didnt' faint...which I was VERY THANKFUL for. But then in the middle of the night Jordan fell out of his bed and came in my room to tell me. So I got up to tuck him back in bed. Mason was then awake and I could tell I had to fall asleep right away or I was going to get sick. I handed Mason to Ryan and sure enough...had to grab my walmart sack and head for the floor. (that is my throwing up drill..grab a walmart bag and just lay on the floor so if I do faint...i don't fall and get hurt even worse!). Then everything turned black...my hearing disappeared and that is the last thing I remember until I woke up with NO clue as to where I was. Ryan told me I was throwing up and I fainted and I was in our room. He knows the drill. Then I was shaking and was super cold. Ugh! Why does this happen to me? I just don't get it. So now today..i just feel extra weak and scared of throwing up and fainting...it's a fear I have all day long. And I'm here alone with all 3 kids. Jordan got sick at school yesterday so we didn't send him today. But I'm wishing I did send him. He's OBVIOUSLY feeling better. He has TOO much energy to be cooped up in the house. So that means him and Mya keep fighting...AND Mason went down for his nap and of course their fighting woke him up...so he's crying in his bed right now. I'm hoping he'll go back to sleep soon. I've got to get off of here...I'm about to lose my mind. Not to mention my lunch. ugh!